How to build an ancestor altar

1. Choose a place you can tend

A shelf, a side table or a small tray can hold your remembrance space. Choose somewhere away from spills and passing feet.

Wipe the surface. Put down your photograph or written name, then the water if you are using it.

The water is an optional part of this Academy exercise, not a rule about what all ancestors require.

If you share your home, ask before using a shared surface. A tray you bring out and put away is enough.

2. Remember one person

Sit or stand comfortably. Say the person’s name, quietly or aloud. Recall one ordinary detail: their cooking, their laugh, their handwriting.

You might say, “I remember you. Thank you for what you passed on.” These are suggested words, not a sacred formula.

If you do not know any names, write “Those in my lineage whose names I do not know.” Leave space for learning later.

You do not need to imagine a face or fill gaps with invented family stories. Not knowing is a truthful starting point.

Choose a memory that feels welcome. You do not owe an offering to a relative whose memory feels unsafe.

3. Close without looking for a sign

Spend a minute in quiet remembrance. There is no required feeling, message or sign. An ordinary, uneventful moment still counts as practice.

End with a simple thank-you, or say nothing. Return to your evening. You can write one sentence about what you remembered.

Keep the space clean. Replace water regularly and wash the glass. Do not leave food where it can spoil or attract animals.

If you use a real candle, keep it away from fabric, photographs, children and pets. Never leave it unattended; extinguish it before leaving.

When your family’s tradition is unfamiliar

The African diaspora holds many distinct histories and practices. This small exercise cannot stand in for learning your own family’s ways.

If possible, ask a relative what remembrance looked like at home. Ask permission before sharing their stories or copying a private practice.

For tradition-specific rites, seek guidance from a trusted elder or teacher within that tradition. Avoid treating sacred practices as interchangeable decorations.

You can also begin through ordinary remembering: cooking a family recipe, keeping a name, or asking about a photograph.

For another view on personal remembrance spaces, read NPR Life Kit’s guide to ancestral altars. It offers cross-cultural perspectives, not rules for every lineage.